THE FIRST AMONG the wives of the Apostle was Khadijah bint Khuwaylid. The Prophet’s marriage with Khadijah took place before the beginning of revelation when he was twenty-five and she forty years old. Being deeply devoted to the Apostle of God, she supported him during the most difficult period of his life, shared his adversities and troubles with good grace and helped him with her wealth and kind words. She had died three years before the Apostle migrated to Madinah. She had borne the Apostle all his children except Ibrahim. The Apostle always held her in high esteem and very often praised her. There was never an occasion that he would kill a sheep and cut it into pieces and not send them to Khadijah’s friends.[1]
After the death of Khadijah, the Apostle married Sawdah bint Zamā’ah. He was then united in wedlock with ‘Ā’ishah, whom he adored and loved dearly. There has been no woman like her in the whole history of Islam who so deeply understood the teachings of Islam and convincingly explained the issues of jurisprudence; even the most eminent and learned Companions of the Prophet consulted her on intricate legal issues. Hafsah, the daughter of ‘Umar, was the next to join the nuptial tie with the holy Prophet. Thereafter, he married Zaynab bint Khuzaymah who died two months after her marriage to the Apostle. Umm Salamah was then wedded by the Apostle and she was the last of his wives to leave this fleeting world. After her, the Apostle contracted matrimony with Zaynab bint Jahsh, the daughter of his aunt Umaymah. Thereafter, the Apostle took as wives Juwayriyah bint al-Ḥārith, belonging to the tribe of al-Muṣṭaliq and Umm Ḥabībah bint Abū Sufyān in succession. His next wife was Ṣafiyyah, the daughter of the chief of Banū ‘n-Naḍīr. Her father, Ḥuyayy ibn Akhṭab, traced his descent to Hārūn[2] ibn ‘Imrān, the brother of Prophet Mūsā.[3] The honour of being the last spouse of the Apostle went to Maymūnah bint al-Ḥārith of the tribe of Hilāl.
There is no difference of opinion that nine of the Prophet’s wives survived him. Khadījah and Zaynab bint Khuzaymah had died during his life time. All of them, except ‘Ā’ishah, were widows.[4]
The Apostle of God had also two bondswomen who were alive when he died. One of these was Māriyah the Copt, daughter of Sham’ūn, who had been presented to him by Muqawqis, the ruler of Egypt. She bore a son, Ibrāhīm, to the Apostle. The other was Rayḥānah bint Zayd who belonged to the tribe of an-Naḍīr.[5] She was let free on her profession of Islam and thereafter the Apostle took her in marriage.
All the wives of the Prophet being Umm al-Mu’minīn[6] (mothers of the faithful) to the Muslims, they were forbidden to remarry anyone after the death of the Apostle. This was in keeping with the honour and respect due to the Prophet as well as the loving regard every Muslim had for the Messenger of God. The writ of God for the Muslims was:
And it is not for you to cause annoyance to the messenger of Allāh, nor that you should ever marry his wives after him. Lo! that in Allāh’s sight would be an enormity.[7]
THE PROPHET’S MARRIAGES
Up to his twenty-fifth year the Apostle lived alone, enjoying single blessedness. In the flower of his youth, he possessed all the qualities of the life’s morning march: he was good-natured, sound of mind and body and a specimen of Arab manliness. His well-moulded, strongly built frame, courage, generosity, skill in horsemanship and unpretentiousness-the qualities esteemed by the Arabs-came of the wild, barren desert where he had spent his childhood. All these physical and mental gifts are, according to psychologists and scholars of ethics, no less important in moulding the character of a man.
The youthful days of the Apostle, before the beginning of revelation, were free from every blemish; neither his worst enemies during his lifetime nor the mud-slinging critics of later times have ever been able to find the slightest fault with this critical period of his life. His veracity, chastity, innocence and pureness of heart were proverbial for he never indulged in anything unbecoming of a true-souled youth like him.
He married Khadījah at the age of twenty-five. She was a widow who had been twice married, and had also children from her earlier husbands. As most of the authorities agree, she was fifteen years older than the Apostle of God. His next marriage was contracted with Sawdah bint Zamā’ah when he had already crossed his fiftieth year. She had migrated to Abyssinia with her husband who had died there. The Prophet never married any virgin save ‘Ā’ishah-all his marriages were dictated by considerations of kindliness, cementing the bonds of friendship with the alien tribes, setting some example of virtuous behaviour for the Muslims, achieving some public good or forestalling some danger to the nascent community of Islam.
In the tribal society of Arabia, family and matrimonial relationships had a special significance unknown in any other part of the world. Ties of blood lent security, importance and dignity in the tribal society of Arabia. The marriages of the Apostle were, thus, invariably conducive to the dissemination of the message of Islam among pagan tribes and thus they were a means of strengthening the idealistic society of Madīnah to the extent the ties of blood created through these marriages were helpful in putting a check to unnecessary bloodshed-the perpetual sport of the Bedouin-and both of these were absolutely necessary for the survival of the Muslim community. Also, neither the Prophet nor his wives ever led a life of ease and luxury-as one is apt to think of polygamous marriages. His was a life of exemplary restraint and frugality, self-denial and temperance, a life so uniquely pure and chaste that not even the greatest puritan of any time or clime can be compared with him. We shall cite some examples of his simple and frugal living while describing the Apostle’s character and manners, but the testimony of God should be sufficient to convince every honest man about the absence of ease and comfort in the married life of the holy Prophet.
O Prophet! say unto your wives: If you desire the world’s life and its adornment, come! I will content you and will release you with a fair release. But if you desire Allāh and His messenger and the abode of the Hereafter, then lo! Allāh hath prepared for the good among you an immense reward.[8]
The great objective which the Apostle of God had set before his wives as well as their own immaculate and upright disposition had guided all of them to give but one answer to the question posed by God. None of them had the least hesitation in making her choice in favour of God and His Messenger and the ultimate salvation. The Apostle recited the verses above before ‘Ā’ishah and said, “Lo! Do not make haste in giving your reply and consult your parents.” She replied, “What is there to consult my parents about? I want God and His Apostle and the abode of the Hereafter.”[9] She relates that all the wives of the Prophet gave a similar reply.[10]
The Prophet’s polygamous bonds of matrimony and the multifarious demands they entailed never caused him to neglect, even for the shortest period of time, either the great responsibility of his mission or the affairs of the Muslims or even his own exacting religious and spiritual practice. They rather helped him to devote himself to his mission with a renewed vigour and enthusiasm. The wives of the Apostle always lent him a helping hand in the dissemination of his message and expounding the teachings of Islam to his followers. They accompanied him in his expeditions and nursed the sick and the wounded. In fact, about one-third of the teachings of Islam in regard to social, marital and household responsibilities of the Muslims has come to be known through the Apostle’s wives who enlightened and guided the Muslims about the family life and behaviour of the Prophet with the members of his household.[11]
The great service rendered to Islam by the wives of the Apostle is best illustrated by ‘Ā’ishah about whom adh-Dhahabī (d. 748/1347), one of the most eminent scholars of the science of ḥadīth writes in the Tadhkirat al-Ḥuffāẓ:
Among the Companions of the Prophet well-versed in jurisprudence she was the most prominent, for even the leading jurists referred to her for advice on intricate questions of law. Qabīṣah bint Dhuwayb says that ‘Ā’ishah knew more about law than most of the Companions who would ask her questions. Abū Mūsā says that if any Companion of the Prophet amongst us had any difficulty in finding out the real purport of any tradition, he would enquire about it from ‘Ā’ishah, for she invariably knew about it. Ḥaṣṣān says that he found nobody more deeply versed than ‘Ā’ishah in the Qur’ān, injunctions about the things permitted and forbidden or mandatory and obligatory, poetry, Arabian history and genealogy.[12]
The moral virtues of the Apostle’s wives are beyond words; their clemency and benignity, grace and compassion, generosity and nobility, and open-hearted magnanimity are demonstrated by the incident handed down by Hishām on the authority of his father. He relates that “Once the Caliph Mu’āwiyah sent one hundred thousand dirhams to ‘Ā’ishah and, by God, the month was not over when she had given it all away to the poor and the needy.” Thereupon a bondmaid said to her, “It would have been better if you had bought meat for a dirham.” ‘Ā’ishah replied, “Why didn’t you tell me earlier?”[13] It is also related that ‘Ā’ishah was then fasting.[14]
The question of polygamous marriage allowed by Islam has long troubled the minds of orientalists and Western writers. Their vexation springs from their desire to hem in the matrimonial laws of Islam and the time-honoured practice of the Arab countries, within their own Western concepts and customs. They are too often anxious to transpose their own standards-the product of peculiar circumstances in a particular type of society, lacking the sanction of divine authority-into a system growing out of the innate disposition and circumstances of Arabian society that carries not only social and moral benefits but also rests on the law of God. Truly speaking, it is a failing of the Western way of thought and its protagonists that they present the Western concepts of morality as the standard of human behaviour and then ruthlessly proceed to set a value on everything that goes contrary to it. What they actually do is to raise a whimsical issue and then go ahead to find an answer to the problem. This is all due to their self-conceitedness and chauvinistic approbation of everything originating in the West.
A Western biographer of the Apostle has been bold enough to pin-point this common weakness of the Occidentals who try to bring in a verdict on the marriages of the Prophet.
Mohammad’s married life must not be looked at from an Occidental point of view or from that set by Christian conventions. These men and women were not Occidentals and they were not Christians. They were living at a period and in a country where the only known ethical standards were theirs. Even so, there is no reason why the codes of America and Europe should be considered superior to those of the Arabs. The people of the West have many things to give to the people of the East. They have much to glean, too, and until they can prove that their way of living is on a higher moral standard than anybody else’s, they should reserve judgement on other creeds and castes and countries.[15]
The West condemns polygamy as an unmitigated evil and refuses, unwittingly, to attach any value to it. But, the so-called evil is neither unnatural nor abnormal, nor is its condemnation based on any universally accepted principle that it would continue to be rejected by the coming generations. The system envisages the role of men and women according to their nature while its rejection resting merely upon imaginary and fanciful scruples, derives support from powerful mass media that the West possesses. With the fast changing social, economic and moral pattern of the modern society the world will, in all probability, ultimately reject the Western values of monogamous marriages.
In one of the most challenging and appalling studies of the modern time, Alwin Toffer analysed the symptoms of terrifying changes emerging in the Western super-industrial society as a result of its present dehumanising values. He has even predicted that as sexual attitudes of the West loosen up, as property rights become less important because of rising affluence, the social repression of polygamy may come to be regarded as irrational.[16]
THE PROPHET’S CHILDREN
Khadījah, the first wife of the Apostle, gave birth to his son al-Qāsim, after whose name the Prophet was given the honorific Abu’l-Qāsim, that is, father of Qāsim. He died in infancy. Thereafter she bore the Apostle four daughters, Zaynab, Ruqayyah, Umm Kulthūm and Fāṭimah. One more son named ‘Abdullāh was also born to her. ‘Abdullāh was given the cognomens Ṭayyab and Ṭāhir according to Ibn al-Qayyim, but there are others who regard the three as separate sons of the Prophet. All these sons and daughters of the Apostle were born to Khadījah.[17]
Fāṭimah was held dearest by the Prophet amongst his children. The Apostle of God once said about her: “She will be the leader of women in Paradise.”[18] and “Fāṭimah is a part of me, and whose offends her offends me.”[19] After the Prophet’s death, she was the first amongst his family members to bid farewell to this world.
Māriyah the Copt was the mother of Ibrāhīm, another son of the Prophet. He also died in infancy. In his deep sorrow over the child’s death the Apostle
of God said, “The eyes weep and the heart grieves, but we say nothing that displeases our Lord, and we are grieved over being separated from you, Ibrāhīm.”[20]
There was a solar eclipse on the day Ibrāhīm died. Some of the Companions attributed the eclipse to Ibrāhīm’s death, but the Apostle corrected them in a speech wherein he said, “The sun and the moon are two of the signs of God; they are not eclipsed on account of anyone’s death.”[21]
Zaynab was married to Abū ‘l-‘Āṣ ibn Rabī’, a nephew of Khadījah, and had two children, a son named ‘Alī and a daughter whose name was Umāmah. Ruqayyah, another daughter of the Apostle, was betrothed to ‘Uthmān to whom she bore a son named ‘Abdullāh. Ruqayyah died while the Apostle was at Badr and ‘Uthmān was left behind to look after her. Umm Kulthūm, sister of Ruqayyah, was then united in marriage with ‘Uthmān whence he came to be known as Dhu ‘n-Nūrayn, “the possessor of two lights.”
Fāṭimah was joined in wedlock with ‘Alī the son of Abū Ṭālib and a cousin of the Apostle. Their elder son was Ḥasan, by whose name ‘Alī acquired the title of Abū ‘l-Ḥasan and the younger one was Ḥusayn. Both of them were dearest to the Prophet’s heart and were praised by him in these words; “The two are my sweet-smelling blossoms in the world.”[22] On another occasion he said about them, “These two will be the leaders of youths in Paradise.”[23]
God blessed Ḥasan and Ḥusayn with a progeny numerous as stars in the firmament and caused them to serve Islam and its followers. Great leaders and scholars and heavenly-minded saints were born amongst them who raised the banner of revolt against every corruption and iniquity and restored the health of the soul to the Muslims.[24] ‘Alī and Fāṭimah had two more daughters, Zaynab and Umm Kulthūm. The first was married to her cousin, ‘Abdullāh ibn Ja’far, who was regarded as one of the most generous persons in Arabia. Zaynab bore two sons, ‘Alī and ‘Awn to ‘Abdullāh. Umm Kulthūm was given in marriage to ‘Umar ibn al-Khaṭṭāb to whom she bore a son named Zayd.[25]
All the sons and daughters of the Apostle of God except Fāṭimah, died during his lifetime. Fāṭimah yielded her breath six months after the demise of the Prophet.[26]
***
[1] Bukhārī: ‘Ā’ishah relates that she was jealous of Khadijah although she had never seen her.
[2] Aaron.
[3] Moses.
[4] Zād al-Ma’ād, vol. 1. pp. 26-29.
[5] According to some, she belonged to Banū Qurayẓah.
[6] Ibn Kathīr, vol. IV. pp. 604-5.
[7] Qur’ān 33:53
[8] Qur’ān 33:28-29.
[9] Bukhārī, on the authority of ‘Ā’ishah.
[10] Bukhārī, on the authority of Ibn Abī Ḥātim.
[11] The significance and indispensibility of polygamous marriages have been expounded by Qāḍhī Sulaimān Mansūrpūrī in vol. II of Raḥmat li ‘l-‘Ālamīn (pp. 141-144) and an Egyptian scholar ‘Abbās Maḥmūd al-‘Aqqād throws light on subject in the ‘Abqariyyah Muḥammad.
[12] Tadhkirat al-Ḥuffāẓ. vol I, p. 28.
[13] Ibid.
[14] Ibid., on the authority, of Umm Dharah.
[15] R. V. C. Bodley, The Messenger: The Life of Mohammad (London, 1946) pp.202-203.
[16] Alwin Toffer, Future and Schock, (London 1975) pp. 227-232.
[17] Zād al-Ma’ād, vol. I, pp. 25-26.
[18] Tirmidhī, vol. II, p. 421.
[19] Bukhārī and other authentic collections.
[20] Muslim, on the authority of Asmā’ bint Yazīd ibn as-Sakan.
[21] Muslim: Kitāb al-Kusūf.
[22] Al-Anwār, Ibn Ad-Diba’ p.67.
[23] Bukhārī: Kitāb al-Manāqib.
[24] Tirmidhī, vol. II, p. 221.
[25] Ibn Hishām, vol. IV, pp. 581-82.
[26] Zād al-Ma’ād, vol. I, p. 26.
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